I got this amazing message forwarded from one on my friend today morning and posted here for you.

A friend sent an early “Valentine” to see if it will make it around the world by February 14th.

“For God so loVed the world,
That He gAve
His onLy
BegottEn
SoN
That whosoever
Believeth In Him
Should Not perish,
But have Everlasting life.”
-John 3:16

One of my friend forwarded this email to me. I copied it here for you all. Enjoy!

Man discovered COLORS and invented PAINT; Woman discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP.

Man discovered the WORD and invented CONVERSATION ; Woman discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP .

Man discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD ; Woman discovered FOOD and invented DIET .

Man discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE; Woman discovered LOVE and invented LOVE TRIANGLES.

Man discovered TRADING and invented MONEY; Woman discovered MONEY and invented SHOPPING .

That’s it!!!

Thereafter man has discovered and invented a lot of things… While women are still STUCK with shopping!!!

I got a link from my friend and posted here. Hope you will enjoy.

I work at the computer store on a campus. A few weeks ago, we had a customer call in and ask the following:

• Customer: “I’d like to buy the Internet. Do you know how much it is?”

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• Customer: “How much does it cost to have the Internet installed?”

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• Customer: “I would like the disc with the Internet on it.”

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Also heard in a University store:

• Customer: “Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?”

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• Customer: “I would like an Internet please.”

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• Customer: “When I sign up, do I need to be home so you can come out and install the Internet to my house?”

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• Customer: “I just got your Internet in the mail today…”

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• Customer: “I just downloaded the Internet. How do I use it?”

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• Customer: “Excuse me, could you sell me an Internet?”

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• Customer: “I don’t have a computer at home. Is the Internet available in book form?”

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• Customer: “Will the Internet be open on Memorial Day tomorrow?”

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• Customer: “We’re getting an Internet from you. Are you guys having any problems sending out your Internets?”

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• Customer: “I can’t get online.”
• Tech Support: “Can you be more specific?”
• Customer: “It says, ‘Bad username/password’.”
• Tech Support: “What is your username?”
• Customer: “Are you sure that the Internet isn’t closed for the night?”

I was extremely tempted to tell him how people in Europe and Asia wake up at odd hours just to use the net.

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I just had a call from a customer who wanted to know if she had to bring in her computer to get connected to the Internet or if we could pick it up and deliver.

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• Customer: “My boyfriend says that I need a memory card to run the Internet. Is this where I get one?”

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• Customer: “The Internet is running too slow. Could you reboot it please?”

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• Customer: “We’re going on holiday for three months, can you suspend the Internet for us please?”

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I work for a local ISP. Frequently we receive phone calls that go something like this:

• Customer: “Hi. Is this the Internet?”

…or…

• Customer: “Do you own the Internet?”

…or…

• Customer: “Is this ‘Internet’ the same as ‘www’ and do you own that as well?”

We would love to be able to say, just once, to these callers, “YES! We are the Internet, and we own all.”

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• Customer: “I have a question about the Internet.”
• Tech Support: “Ok, what’s your question?”
• Customer: “How do I unsubscribe from a BBS?”
• Tech Support: “Uh, well, you should probably contact the people that run it.”
• Customer: “Well who owns the Internet?”

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I once got a “priority” tech support phone call. The guy’s first words were: “I’m a vice president at [major ISP company], and we own the Internet.”

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Overheard on a train ride:

“The Internet — isn’t that a microchip?”

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Overheard near the public Internet terminals in the Kiasma Modern Arts Museum in Helsinki, Finland:

“Isn’t Netscape Navigator the Internet?”

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Some people pay for their online services with checks made payable to “The Internet.”

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Had a guy call just recently, asking how to get to the Internet through a word processor.

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• Customer: “What do you mean I have to pay for Internet access??”

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From a discussion on IRC:

• “I have a problem with my Internet. Anyone know how to get the screens smaller?”

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I got a call from an administrative assistant in our office. She said when she opened Netscape it was smaller than normal, so she could not see the entire Internet.

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• Customer: “Do you have to use Netscape to get on the Internet, or do you have to use the program Netscape?”

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• Friend: “I’m going to leave AOL. I think I’ll switch to Netscape.”
• Me: “Um, Netscape isn’t a way to get on the Internet. It’s what lets you look at the Internet. You need an Internet Service Provider like AOL, CompuServe, or AT&T Worldnet.”
• Friend: “Oh. I guess I’ll get Internet Explorer.”

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• Tech Support: “If you don’t have a phone line, you can’t connect to the Internet.”
• Customer: “That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. You guys need to do something about that if you want people to be happy with your service!” (click)

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• Customer: “I lost my Internet. I switched it off last night and turned on this morning, and it’s gone. I just paid $19.95 a month, and I have lost it already. Can you send me another one?”